Tag: Coping

Project all about that bass

Surprisingly, I haven’t put my underwear on backwards or inside out… lately. I also seem to mostly match and rarely go out with puke in my pocket. (Did you even know it is possible to get puke in your pocket? Trust me. It is not only possible… it is probable if your most common attire is overalls which are known for an abundance of pockets)

Wow. That digressed quickly. I just wanted to pop on here and put out a little blurb re reasonable expectations.

I have had to adjust my expectations of myself so that I don’t fester in an over abundance of mom guilt.

My expectation now is that all humans and animals who reside in this domicile will be kept alive through being fed and cared for in the best way I can in this moment in time. (Question- does McDonald’s offer a rewards program for frequent visits? Asking for a friend…)

My expectation of my appearance is that I will neither wow nor leave people wondering. (Read- I wear clothes that are functional and not covered in puke but covered in cookies is still sometimes acceptable.)

My expectation is no longer that I will get a full night’s sleep but rather that I will sleep when I have opportunity to do so. (Read -naps=life)

So how does depression figure in all this? My baseline of self care has adjusted a lot. And self care is a big part of managing depression.

First off… MEDICATION! Yup. Still doing that. Still helps.

Secondly, Movement. Yup. I vacuum. I walk. I dance. I do extra trips up and down the stairs. Occasionally I mall walk. Sometimes I do actual cardio or strength training. But right now, in a period of adjustment I am just doing life. This season is all too short and much too sweet to do anything more. Babies are not babies forever.

Other ingredients in my recipe for this life with babies:

Showering. Eating as well as I can. Multivitamin. Lots of water. So much coffee!!! And the piece de resistance — a sense of humour, delight in each moment (even when I dip my hands in poo… again), being present with these precious baby boys and loving on them as they grow in wisdom and stature (Read- one is a climber and daily outsmarting me as he gets more proficient in said climbing.)

Project gifted

This baby is incredibly blessed to somehow magically pee out of his diaper with such force that not only did it splat on the floor but soaked my shirt and somehow not his own!! He has also managed to upchuck inside my shirt so I think that is just the gift that keeps on giving.

I am pretty proud of my own personal talent… I can wiggle my ears… so there is that at least.

I love how we are all continually learning and growing but how we also have things about us that just are. One thing that ‘ just is ‘ about me is my love for young humans. Although I am tired, I am daily exerting my energies within my giftedness and passion and so I am at peace and filled with joy.

To go to bed at the end of the day exhausted from doing good and working wholeheartedly within my ‘just is’ is totally worth it. Now if I could just figure out how to take care of myself a little better within that I would be golden. (Says the woman with a week’s worth of dry shampoo in her hair)

Project Snap out of it!

What evil mastermind thought parents should have to deal with snaps on sleepers with little, wiggly humans in the middle of the night?

I personally think it may have been the same person who invented pantyhose and spanx.

Also, are teeth really that useful other than for keeping our faces from caving in and for chewing steak and stuff? The littlest one has popped out 3 in 5 days and this mamma is tiiiiiiired!!!!

Some things in life are necessary and we just have to power through the pain and discomfort. Other things, not so much.

It is our responsibility to figure out what’s what and try not to bulldozer our way through life. I think our sense of self, our families and others placed in our lives depends on it.

Project The Who

Did someone get excited for a second thinking I was going to talk about legendary band The Who’?

I thought it would be more fun to tell you that the toddler in our home has been super into eating and drinking like a dog. I guess that is because the ‘siblings’ he is around the most are the furry ones.

In the past couple of days he has added to his repertoire of fun tricks and now says “wash, wash, wash the face” as he licks his hands and rubs his face. Pretty sure this mannerism came from our cat. Did I mention we have a cat too?

If you are counting that means: 2 adult children (18&20), 2 baby boys (23 1/2 mos and 6 mos), 2 Saint Bernards and a cat.

So, acting like a dog or cat adds up.

If you do your own math, and evaluate your top peeps (or animals I guess..) would you be pleased to discover that your mannerisms and actions have taken on their actions and mannerisms?

I hope to err on the side of spending time with quality people who rub off in me in a good way. I would hate to discover that somehow I have unintentionally become someone less than who I am supposed to be.

P.s. I love Jesus & endeavour ultimately to be more like Him.

Project Out the window & up the nose

The English language… or any language for that matter has escaped me. I am in a sleep shortage. We have a 6 mo old visitor who had yet to sleep through the night. I no longer communicate with actual words but have reverted to gesticulations, head nods and sound effects. If you think you hear a parrot squawk… chances are it’s me…

Little mister is fast approaching 2 years old and his extensive vocabulary is astonishing. That said, he randomly strings together words in a sentence and looks intensely into your eyes willing you to understand. “Up the nose”, “out the window”, and “I make a poopy” are current favs.

I love his fervour and passion as he endeavours to use language to make his needs known.

We could all learn a thing or two from him about the importance of what we say and how we say it:

A) choose your words carefully

B) make eye contact

C) make sure you are understood. If not, repeat a&b

Project John Stamos

In Uncle Jesse’s words… “have mercy!” (Full House fans — you’re welcome.)

There comes a time when we have to wave the white flag and surrender. We have to surrender to the fact that we just can’t do it all.

We are currently dabbling at having some hired help for cleaning so that we can focus in on family and not get bogged down (and crabby) about other tasks that just shouldn’t matter in this season of our lives.

Case in point, I wouldn’t be able to write or shower quite frankly if not for this seeming indulgence.

As the mom of two bigs and two little littles, I know how quickly time passes and I don’t want to miss a thing.

HAVE MERCY!!

Project psssst…

I didn’t even know the word ‘dry shampoo’ when a can of ‘psssst’ found its way into my bathroom cabinet. Perhaps it was a slight misstep in name as it conjures up images of muppets in trench coats asking if I want to buy the letter ‘b’. Nevertheless it is a brand name that is still in my mind over 20 years later.

I think we all make slight missteps in how we brand ourselves in this world where self-promotion through social media allows us to manipulate perception through posts and pics of our very best days.

I am not defined by my depression. It is not my brand. It is just part of my journey. I get to hone in on what really matters in my life because my body throws up cues and warning signals when I misstep. I think rather than an attitude of woe is me perhaps that is a reason to be thankful.

Project ‘the Code’

My husband has a gadget that he can hook up and instantaneously know the issue of our car.

Oh! If only! If only we could hook ourselves up and have a doodad throw the code of whatever ails us.

I feel like my body and mind do give me cues on when things are going awry. But, I have to be paying attention. It is very easy in the hustle and bustle of life to ignore the signs and push through.

When all else fails, I take the time to stop and self-diagnose. Usually, the problem is as simple as going back to the basics of my non-negotiable (which sometimes become negotiable–therein lies the problem) and taking the next right step back to me being me.

Today’s next step is to stop and pay attention. Depression ain’t no friend of mine.

Project Lipstick

So it turns out it is national lipstick day! Who knew? So I slapped on some lipstick. Why not?

For me lipstick is synonymous with girl power. This may have something to do with:

A) I am a Mary Kay cosmetics rep and Mary Kay the woman and the company are all about girl power!

B) I fully believe in the idea of giving yourself a little pick me up with something as simple as applying a touch of makeup.

Can we take this idea a little further? What if lipstick could represent the idea of caring for the here and now? Embracing the situation we are in and putting our best foot/face/effort forward?

If we are always looking ahead, then we will miss the extravagant gift of the here and now. If we are saving our best selves for the future then I am afraid we will be sadly disappointed.

I promise that if you fail to appreciate the now you will never be happy in the days ahead. Food for thought. Now go thee therefore and apply some lipstick!