Project Pissenlit

My humour is very refined. When I saw that ‘dandelion’ translates to ‘pissenlit’ in French, I giggled. I now only call dandelions ‘pissenlit’ because I am sophisticated like that. (See definition below)

I recently began limiting my caffeine intake to one coffee per day. To help curb that craving for a little pick me up in the afternoon I discovered that dandelion tea is a comparable substitute.

False. This is fake news. No matter how closely it resembles, dandelion tea is not coffee.

No matter how closely we make our new normal resemble our former life pre-covid; we all long for our normal normal.

Yes, we have become bakers, chefs, teachers, writers, poets, bloggers, and more. We are resilient. But let’s call a spade a spade. This. Sucketh.

(The web told me: “In French, dandelion is pissenlit, a noun composed of a conjugated form of the verb pisser, to piss, the preposition en, meaning in, and the noun lit, bed, because this plant was formerly well known for its diuretic properties.” )

Project Lustre

Breaking news! My sparkles are showing! Did you hear that hair colour has become the new toilet paper??!

An alien must have burst out of my face this morning because the mere application of lipstick seemed to solicit strange stares from the fam jam.

There has to be a happy compromise between incessantly grooming ourselves and changing from day pyjamas to night pyjamas.

This is a unique moment in our history. Yes, it is scary. Yes, it can feel stressful. Yes, it can feel overwhelming. We can feel ill prepared. But, each day we have an opportunity to be just a bit better than the last. Be kind to yourself. Extend grace to others and take one itty bitty baby step forward.

When all this covid is in the rearview, I suspect we are all going to look very different. I for one will be a little bit more sparkly and a lot more grateful.

Project Cozy cozy

Little R has taken to grabbing shirts, jackets, underwear, blankets and pillows in order to tuck himself into a cute little nest.

There is something to be said about being comfortable. We are NOT in comfortable times right now in the world . Many of us have found ourselves binge shopping, binge watching or binge eating in order to cope with a pandemic . I think it is times like these that show us what we are made of. Apparently a lot of us are made out of toilet paper??!

It would be very easy to just stay in my ugly sweats or pjs and melt into a puddle of complacency or fear. Perhaps we get a little bit too ‘cozy cozy’ when the world becomes simultaneously too big and too small as the world hyper focuses on the latest news on the covid19 virus.

As someone who has a predisposition towards depression; complacency and or fear are not winning scenarios. So, in the face of crisis, (for all of us) one thing I personally can do is show up. And not just show up, but show up a little bit better than I did yesterday. I have to see beyond myself and really reach in with my family, up to my Heavenly Father and out to those who don’t have the same supports and blessings I do.

We are all learning as we go. Today, I am choosing to up level my existence by writing this. Maybe one person will be blessed to know that I am struggling too?

Project “that’s famous!”

Baby R has a new learning app that rewards him for his good work with ‘that’s famous!’ He hasn’t regurgitated that expression yet but he does applaud himself for his sneezes with a ‘good one.’ We teach him amazing stuff.

What a world we would live in if we spent more time giving ourselves (and others) a little credit. A little “I am doing this thing in this moment in time to the best of my abilities and It. Is. Good.” Or in baby R’s case… good sneeze.

As someone who primarily utilizes self-deprecating humour as a defence/coping mechanism, I find this hard. And if I view myself this way… does that not taint how I view others?

So, I’ve been practicing grace. For my purposes I am going to oversimplify the definition as ‘unmerited kindness.’ My friends! Can we just be a little bit more kind?!? Please??! Kind in such a way that doesn’t even make sense, that is bigger than us, and more loving than we can even imagine.

This message is brought to you by: 6 mos of not sleeping through the night, adding a newborn to our baby posse, going out in public with puke in my hair or on my shirt, wearing clothes inside out or backwards, and the letter ‘f’.

Project snoresville

I am writing this from our local outlet mall parking lot. This was by no means my plan.

I can’t help but smile as I listen to soft snores from the backseat. This is our first time out in a few days. (2 babies plus the mommy = ‘our’.) Our home has been a snot fest (sorry… gross…) and so I quarantined us.

So, with infinite wisdom I decided today we would have an outing because we are mostly better … even though my heart rate is over 100 as my body continues to fight this bug and both babies have permaboogers crusted on their noses.

May I add that our first stop of the day was Walmart for some much needed supplies. Mid-shop the power went out and so we subsequently had to abandon our cart.

It may sound like I am griping but I promise you I am not. I am happy. Soft snores mean happier (and hopefully healthier) boys and sunshine streaming in through my window while sipping coffee (#3) as I type this is just what I need.

Happy Monday all!!

Project all about that bass

Surprisingly, I haven’t put my underwear on backwards or inside out… lately. I also seem to mostly match and rarely go out with puke in my pocket. (Did you even know it is possible to get puke in your pocket? Trust me. It is not only possible… it is probable if your most common attire is overalls which are known for an abundance of pockets)

Wow. That digressed quickly. I just wanted to pop on here and put out a little blurb re reasonable expectations.

I have had to adjust my expectations of myself so that I don’t fester in an over abundance of mom guilt.

My expectation now is that all humans and animals who reside in this domicile will be kept alive through being fed and cared for in the best way I can in this moment in time. (Question- does McDonald’s offer a rewards program for frequent visits? Asking for a friend…)

My expectation of my appearance is that I will neither wow nor leave people wondering. (Read- I wear clothes that are functional and not covered in puke but covered in cookies is still sometimes acceptable.)

My expectation is no longer that I will get a full night’s sleep but rather that I will sleep when I have opportunity to do so. (Read -naps=life)

So how does depression figure in all this? My baseline of self care has adjusted a lot. And self care is a big part of managing depression.

First off… MEDICATION! Yup. Still doing that. Still helps.

Secondly, Movement. Yup. I vacuum. I walk. I dance. I do extra trips up and down the stairs. Occasionally I mall walk. Sometimes I do actual cardio or strength training. But right now, in a period of adjustment I am just doing life. This season is all too short and much too sweet to do anything more. Babies are not babies forever.

Other ingredients in my recipe for this life with babies:

Showering. Eating as well as I can. Multivitamin. Lots of water. So much coffee!!! And the piece de resistance — a sense of humour, delight in each moment (even when I dip my hands in poo… again), being present with these precious baby boys and loving on them as they grow in wisdom and stature (Read- one is a climber and daily outsmarting me as he gets more proficient in said climbing.)

Project gifted

This baby is incredibly blessed to somehow magically pee out of his diaper with such force that not only did it splat on the floor but soaked my shirt and somehow not his own!! He has also managed to upchuck inside my shirt so I think that is just the gift that keeps on giving.

I am pretty proud of my own personal talent… I can wiggle my ears… so there is that at least.

I love how we are all continually learning and growing but how we also have things about us that just are. One thing that ‘ just is ‘ about me is my love for young humans. Although I am tired, I am daily exerting my energies within my giftedness and passion and so I am at peace and filled with joy.

To go to bed at the end of the day exhausted from doing good and working wholeheartedly within my ‘just is’ is totally worth it. Now if I could just figure out how to take care of myself a little better within that I would be golden. (Says the woman with a week’s worth of dry shampoo in her hair)

Project Snap out of it!

What evil mastermind thought parents should have to deal with snaps on sleepers with little, wiggly humans in the middle of the night?

I personally think it may have been the same person who invented pantyhose and spanx.

Also, are teeth really that useful other than for keeping our faces from caving in and for chewing steak and stuff? The littlest one has popped out 3 in 5 days and this mamma is tiiiiiiired!!!!

Some things in life are necessary and we just have to power through the pain and discomfort. Other things, not so much.

It is our responsibility to figure out what’s what and try not to bulldozer our way through life. I think our sense of self, our families and others placed in our lives depends on it.

Project The Who

Did someone get excited for a second thinking I was going to talk about legendary band The Who’?

I thought it would be more fun to tell you that the toddler in our home has been super into eating and drinking like a dog. I guess that is because the ‘siblings’ he is around the most are the furry ones.

In the past couple of days he has added to his repertoire of fun tricks and now says “wash, wash, wash the face” as he licks his hands and rubs his face. Pretty sure this mannerism came from our cat. Did I mention we have a cat too?

If you are counting that means: 2 adult children (18&20), 2 baby boys (23 1/2 mos and 6 mos), 2 Saint Bernards and a cat.

So, acting like a dog or cat adds up.

If you do your own math, and evaluate your top peeps (or animals I guess..) would you be pleased to discover that your mannerisms and actions have taken on their actions and mannerisms?

I hope to err on the side of spending time with quality people who rub off in me in a good way. I would hate to discover that somehow I have unintentionally become someone less than who I am supposed to be.

P.s. I love Jesus & endeavour ultimately to be more like Him.

Project Out the window & up the nose

The English language… or any language for that matter has escaped me. I am in a sleep shortage. We have a 6 mo old visitor who had yet to sleep through the night. I no longer communicate with actual words but have reverted to gesticulations, head nods and sound effects. If you think you hear a parrot squawk… chances are it’s me…

Little mister is fast approaching 2 years old and his extensive vocabulary is astonishing. That said, he randomly strings together words in a sentence and looks intensely into your eyes willing you to understand. “Up the nose”, “out the window”, and “I make a poopy” are current favs.

I love his fervour and passion as he endeavours to use language to make his needs known.

We could all learn a thing or two from him about the importance of what we say and how we say it:

A) choose your words carefully

B) make eye contact

C) make sure you are understood. If not, repeat a&b